Around this time, about 7 years ago, I was asking myself “Should I pay my rent or buy Christmas presents?”
Money was really tight and there was no option for me to pay for both.
So that year, I didn’t buy any Christmas presents for my kids.
So in today’s video, I’m gonna tell you why I ended up making that tough choice, how I handled the guilt of feeling like I couldn’t provide for my kids.. and also what I probably should’ve done instead..
Video Transcript- Should I Pay Rent or Buy Christmas presents?
Hey this is Danielle Ford and RosaBelle Ford and I didn’t really plan a video for this week.
It’s just been one of those weeks that just kind of got a head of me and I just wasn’t feeling very good and kind of have a headache and just have a ton of stuff to do to get ready for Christmas and the kids are gonna be out of school soon so I’ve just been doing a lot of stuff. But it’s really funny, I actually decided to shoot this video because I’m sitting here wrapping presents and it’s late and the kids are sleeping and I’m like, kind of stressed, like “I have all these presents to wrap and I have to do all this stuff.
But the ironic part of that is that just a couple years ago I didn’t have any presents to wrap.
I was really struggling and when the kids were about 3-4, or 2-3-ish, I was working 2 jobs as an Esthetician during they day and bartender at night and I made money, I made OK money but I also didn’t get child support and had an apartment to pay for and daycare and bills and food and everything else..
So that’s where all my money went and I remember that I felt really bad and guilty that I wasn’t able to get the kids gifts, and I was really thinking, “Should I pay my rent or buy presents?”
And I thought ultimately, we’re not gonna have a place to have Christmas if the bills don’t get paid, so I didn’t buy them a single present.
Luckily, my mom bought them some things so it wasn’t like they didn’t have anything, But at that time, I felt like because I wasn’t destitute, or homeless.. you know how you always hear about feeding and helping the homeless? I had too much pride to tell anyone that I couldn’t afford presents.
And I just remember feeling really shitty that I wasn’t able to get presents for the kids.
And the next year, I actually went ape shit and bought way too much stuff which was dumb but I felt like I was making up for it.
But my whole point of this is to say that I’m sure there are a lot of people watching this that are in that situation now that I was in and it really sucks. When you have to ultimately make the decision to buy something frivolous for your kids like presents or be responsible and pay the bills, the bills come first, obviously.
And looking back, there was no reason for me to feel guilty. For one, the were taken care of by my mom and if they hadn’t been, I would’ve totally been in a perfect place to go ask for presents. There’s so many people and organizations and people just waiting to help a single mom, and people just waiting to donate, especially around this time of year. So, I probably should’ve done that, but I had way too much pride and that was stupid.
Another thing that’s really important to remember is that quote that: “Children want your PRESENCE, not your PRESENTS.” -Click to Tweet this!
So, it doesn’t matter what they get, they ultimately want to do something with you, so if you can take some old stuff you have and re-gift it, create a little game, do a little scavenger hunt, or whatever, there’s always fun things that you can do with your kids on Christmas.
That’s kind of just what I was thinking about because I just want to let you know that it gets better, it does, I promise. And you don’t know how or when, but it does. And one day, you’ll look back at the tough times and you’ll be like, “Oh my gosh, I can’t believe I got through that. But I did. So that’s good.”
So, I’m gonna wrap this video up because I have presents to wrap and a puppy to play with. So let me know if you’re in that situation, don’t feel guilty if you can’t provide much for your kids because you’re doing the best you can and one day, one day you’ll be able to look back and be like, “I’m so glad I’m out of that situation” and you’ll actually be able to help other people that are in that situation.
It sucks when you’re in it but you get through it. That’s my story.
Sorry this video is kind of all over the place, I didn’t even plan it, I just put the camera up and started talking, which doesn’t really work out very good because I just kind of go on little random tangents and talk everywhere and I don’t know what I’m talking about and then my dog attacks me and I love her.
So if you have any comments, questions, concerns, opinions, wanna tell me I’m dumb, or not, leave them in the comments and if this is your first video you’re watching, I make better videos, I promise, so go to YoungMomsClub.com and join the club.
I also have a free e book that I wrote called “The 7 Steps to Being a Kick ass Young Mom” that I’d love to share with you. A lot of girls write me back and tell me that it’s really inspiring, and it really came from my heart, so go there and sign up and I will connect with you after that. Ok?
If you liked this video, then like it and if you know somebody who might need to hear this message, that they are enough as a mom, with no presents, or little presents, or even a feeling of guilt because somebody else has to buy presents for their kids, share this video with them, ok? Alright, I will see you next week.
Did you miss last week’s video? Check it out here: Are you Brainwashed by the Media? 3 questions to ask yourself..