This featured guest blog is definitely something young moms and pregnant teens can relate to. We are so happy that Melissa Monk, one of our previous “Spotlight Young Moms”, allowed us to share her blog written as a heartfelt letter directly to pregnant teenagers.
PREGNANT reads the words on the test, confirming your worst fear. Take a deep breath, and let it soak in. I know you’re scared. I know that your heart is racing and your palms are sweaty. Your mind is jumping to a million places.. Just close your eyes and take another deep breath. And know that it’s okay to cry.. Its okay to be scared and not know what to do…you’re not alone in this.
The world is screaming at you, “How could you be so stupid, you’ve ruined your life. Your child is a mistake. You’re never going to amount to anything, and neither will your child.” But that’s not true, beautiful. Little does the world know this was a part of your plan all along. You were always meant to be a mother.
YOU will amount to something. YOU and your child will go places in this life, but only if you work hard enough for it. YOU are not stupid for having sex. Its a natural human instinct, and the fact that you became pregnant is NOT a mistake. Your child is NOT a “mistake” or an “accident”.
This may not be the way you’ve planned your life to go, or how you saw yourself starting a family, but what’s done is done. Your baby did not ruin your future, it gave you a new one.. A brighter one. Your age, marital status, weight, height, race, or religion does NOT determine the quality of mother that can and will be. YOU determine that.. there is no magical maturity switch that flips when you turn 20, and being young does NOT predispose you to being a “bad mother”. Do not let the world limit you by forcing you into a statistic, making you feel not good enough.
And if you’re worried about your child’s father not sticking around.. Let him leave. Let him be the one to miss out on all of the non replaceable moments with your child. It’s not your fault, or your child’s fault at all that he is not man enough to take responsibility. Do not waste your precious energy chasing after him. If he is meant to be in your life he will be. GOD will put him there. Just like he did with your baby. It’s better for your child to have no father, than to have a “half ass” father who pops in and out of its life all the time. One day he will regret walking away, but you won’t regret letting him.
As hard as it is to ask for help, please dont ever be afraid to ask for it. Its okay to admit that you need help. There is absolutely nothing wrong with admitting that you need guidance. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to be more knowledgeable to better not only your life, but your children’s life as well. There are so many resources in the community willing to help you whether it be government assistance, childcare resources, support groups/clubs, parenting classes, scholarships and financial aid for college or even just therapy to help you get through this life changing event. You just have to be willing to get out there and find it.
Being a teen/young mother is hard. Believe me, I had many nights where I was ready to throw in the towel and rip my hair out. But its not impossible to get through those moments. The good and happy moments that you will have with your child the rest of its life will outweight the bad by millions. A year from now, you’ll look back and be so happy and proud of how far you’ve come. As long as you always remember to fight to be the best mother you can be, you’ll make it through just fine.
Are you ready for this life long adventure through motherhood? Its okay to answer no right now because if you’re not ready right this moment, you’ve got 9 short months to prepare yourself. But you’ll get there. Motherhood is a natural human instinct. Try not to worry so much about the future right now and just take it one step at a time. Good luck and congratulations Mother, motherhood has been waiting for you!
Wow. Melissa, this truly is an incredible insight into motherhood and a great letter to pregnant young women to tell the truth of having a child young and to remind us that we aren’t alone, even when we feel like we are. If you loved this blog post, share it and don’t forget to comment below and tell us!
Also, if you like this post, check out Melissa Monk’s Spotlight and check her out online: